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nightspear) wrote2009-02-13 10:12 am
Brotherhood (10/27)
Title: Brotherhood (Table of Contents)
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: Nothing you recognize is mine. I gain nothing of material value from this.
Pairings: Gen.
| Chapter1 | Chapter2 | Chapter3 | Chapter4 | Chapter5 |
| Chapter6 | Chapter7 | Chapter8 | Chapter9 | Chapter10 |
XXXXX
The Orbanians
XXXXX
14 October 1999; SGC; 1500 hrs
Merrin was eleven years old by her planet's calendar, which meant, according to Sam, not quite twelve Earth years. Daniel was frankly in awe of how quickly Merrin had picked up their language, which he'd found out when SG-1 returned from Orban with the girl and the Orbanian leader, Kalan, in tow. It wasn't the same as when Daniel tried fumblingly to communicate in new languages--this was full, native-like fluency with gaps only for concepts or lexical items that had no Orbanian counterpart. It was impossible. No--it was incredible. Amazing.
Also, this eleven-year-old was going to teach Sam how to build a naquadah reactor. Daniel wasn't entirely sure what that was, but it sounded impressive.
"All Urrone gain knowledge quickly," Merrin had explained to him when she'd initially met him waiting for SG-1's return. "Please explain your other forms of oral communication."
"Actually," Sam had cut in, eying the reactor in the girl's hands, "maybe Merrin can come with me to explain, and Daniel can work with another...uh, what was the word?"
"Urrone," Merrin had said patiently. So Kalan had invited him to visit their homeworld of Orban at a later time to exchange information. Sam had given Daniel a look that said 'get your own Urrone' and shown Merrin eagerly to her lab.
"How was your trip?" Daniel asked once he'd found Jack free to talk afterward.
"Good," Jack said. "The kids are Orbanian students. Smart as anything. They're way ahead of us in technology--not Goa'uld level, but stuff like naquadah reactors is small fries to them. Energy source that runs on naquadah," he added before Daniel had to ask. "Like a giant battery."
"Urrone," Daniel said again to himself, wondering if the word was similar to any language or simply something for which they had no cognate word.
"Apparently the adults learn even faster. We spent most of the first day looking around and teaching the kids English, and then one of them went to teach the adults, and when Kalan came back, he was totally fluent. Even you couldn't've done it."
Daniel shook his head in admiration. Now, that just wasn't fair. "And Teal'c's still there?"
"He's working with Tomin--another one of the Urrone kids on Orban," Jack said. "Teaching him about Goa'uld tactics."
"Huh. Even war tactics are taught first to the children?"
"Apparently. But they're way ahead of us, so they must be doing something right." Daniel supposed that was true. "How about you? Been keeping busy while we were gone?"
"Robert only lets me in the office when he's in there, too," Daniel said, folding his arms and leaning back against the wall. "I mean, it's not like I'm going to destroy something if I'm not supervised."
"You realize," Jack said slowly while giving him a 'you're an idiot' look, "Rothman's just making sure you don't spend twenty-four hours a day in the office? He's glad for help. You should've seen him going nuts trying to get himself more fluent in Goa'uld while you were--" He stopped.
"Going nuts?" Daniel suggested. Another sideways look. "If you keep looking at me like that, I'm going to go nuts again."
"You weren't nuts the first time," Jack said a little too emphatically.
Daniel suppressed a sigh. "I just meant that, with all of you gone and the office off limits after hours, there's not much to do. I ended up reading through the few available issues of Diachronica in the library and the last seven years of the American Journal of Philology."
"We've got to teach you to drive," Jack said. "You have even less of a life than I do."
"So I'm not allowed to step through a wormhole without a psych evaluation and Dr. Fraiser's approval, but I'm allowed to drive a car?"
Jack made a face and started, "It's not like that--"
"I'm...I'm joking, Jack," Daniel sighed, a little apologetic and more frustrated. "Never mind."
He could almost hear Jack scrambling for something to say into the following pause. "How about otherwise? Have you been sleeping better?"
There was a knee-jerk impulse to point out that his sleeping habits were his own business, but he successfully swallowed that and said, "Yes."
Jack's face made the very slight contortion that meant he was cringing internally and forcing himself not to react too much as he said things like--"So...the nightmares...?"
"Jack."
"Yeah, no," Jack said, backing off that topic immediately.
Daniel looked around to make sure no one else was nearby, then admitted, "No one seems to know exactly what to do with me right now. And...I don't know what to do with myself."
Jack rubbed the back of his neck, looking torn, then suddenly brightened. "You wanna get out of here?"
"No," Daniel scoffed. Jack's artificially enthusiastic expression wilted a little. "Jack, you're in the middle of a mission, and SG-1 has two more right after this before you're done with this rotation. I'll catch up with you after that. You've had enough delays already because of me and PY3-948."
"Carter's going to be building that reactor for a while," Jack pointed out. "I'm basically useless right now."
Then Daniel thought of General Hammond's words about whether they were clouding each other's judgment and said, "Thank you, but no. If Orban is what you think it is, this is a...an incredible opportunity. I'm okay, all right?" Jack still looked a little worried, so he added, "Actually, I was going to ask if I can assist Teal'c on Orban until SG-1 is done there."
"You're not really supposed to yet," Jack pointed out carefully. "Has Dr. Fraiser cleared you?"
Daniel hadn't seen Dr. Fraiser since the end of the Linvris debacle, though not for trying on her part. "Well, Dr. Warner said this morning that there was nothing physically wrong with me anymore. General Hammond says I need the psych evaluation for first contact, but I can continue the normal work I did before, which includes second-line work."
"Somehow I don't think Hammond was thinking of fieldwork when he said that."
"You've already established friendly relations, and we have one of their Urrone here. Please, Jack--I'll go mad again if I have to stay here doing nothing for much longer. It's an exchange of knowledge. I just want to do something useful and not have someone get hurt for once."
As Daniel had known he would, Jack gave in, looking guilty. "All right. We'll tell the general, and then you report to Teal'c on Orban."
XXXXX
14 October 1999; Stargate Room, Orban; 1630 hrs
Teal'c was waiting when Daniel stepped out of the wormhole. "Hi," he said, looking around the empty room. "Um, where is everyone?"
"Kalan will bring an Urrone to work with you," Teal'c told him. "They and the Urrone Tomin will return shortly."
"Urrone," Daniel said again, rolling the sound over his tongue. "I still can't figure out what language th--oh, wow, what is that?" He walked toward the DHD and lowered himself to his knees to examine a partially-visible mosaic on the floor. "Teal'c, have you looked at this?"
The sound of Teal'c's boots thumped softly toward him. "I have not examined it in detail. Do you believe it to be significant?"
He ran his fingers over the dusty mosaic and the slab that extended over the artwork. "Not to the Orbanians, clearly," he said, "or they wouldn't have built the DHD's platform over it. Well, I guess we don't know whether the DHD was placed over it by them, and, if so, accidentally or on purpose."
Teal'c dropped to a crouch as well. "What meaning do you find here?"
"I think it tells a story," Daniel said after a minute of study, crawling on hands and knees around to the other side, where it looked like the narrative began. "See the serpent?"
"Indeed," Teal'c said, following him. "Do you believe that to be a Goa'uld?"
It was only when his smile faltered that Daniel realized he'd been smiling at all, that he'd been so excited to see this, a piece of a story puzzle, without being chased by a Goa'uld army or picking up dangerous Goa'uld technology. He should have known better. This was an Abydos cartouche planet, after all.
"I guess that could be it," Daniel said, more subdued. "The feathered serpent was a central figure in Mesoamerican mythologies. Why wouldn't that be a Goa'uld." He looked down at the mosaic surrounding him, then grabbed the side of the DHD to pull himself up, brushing off his hands and the knees of his trousers. "Well."
Daniel stood looking down at Teal'c for a disorienting moment before the Jaffa rose smoothly. "Are you well, Daniel Jackson?"
"Yeah," Daniel said, looking around the walls of the 'gate room. "Look at those murals. They're incredible, aren't they? Are all the buildings around here like this?"
Teal'c lifted an eyebrow, but before he could answer, the Orbanian leader, Kalan, strode back in, two young children following. "Daniel Jackson," the man greeted him.
"Kalan," Daniel said, nodding politely. "May I ask about the history of Orban?" He gestured toward the partially-hidden mosaic on the floor. "I assume the Tau'ri told you that many peoples have ancestors from the planet Earth."
"Yes, they told us this," Kalan said.
"Daniel Jackson believes your people are from Earth's Mesoamerica," Teal'c said.
When Kalan turned to Daniel, he explained, "This"--he tapped a toe at the edge of the mosaic--"is reminiscent of...Aztec culture, I think, or something related. If there is more time, perhaps I, or someone with more knowledge in this part of Tau'ri history, can learn more about your past."
"It is possible that the Goa'uld caused the collapse of that civilization," Teal'c added. Daniel tried not to resent that, because he knew it was true and, indeed, very possible. Not everything had to do with the Goa'uld. Sometimes it was just knowledge--just not often enough.
Kalan bent a little to grip one of the Urrone around the shoulders and nudge her gently toward them. "Please explain this," the man said, then bowed to them before he left.
Daniel looked down awkwardly at the girl while Teal'c nodded to the young boy--Tomin, presumably--and led him to sit on the steps. "Hello. I'm Daniel."
"I am Zaren," the Urrone answered.
"Zaren, let's go to the other end of this room so we don't disturb them." As they settled near part of the mural near the back of the 'gate room, he pulled out a tape recorder. "Will it bother you if I use this?" he asked.
Zaren leaned forward. "What is this?"
"It's a...a recording device," he explained, pulling it open for her to see the tape inside. "It records sounds so they can be played back later."
"Recording," she repeated. "What is 'recording?'"
"It's from Latin," he told her, warming to the subject. "Recordari, to remember, or to call back to mind. In this language, it's taken on the meaning of creating a sort of...artificial memory." Then he frowned. "You don't have recording devices? Or written records? Your devices may be much more advanced than this, but..."
"Why do you need such a device?" she asked, peering into the open tape deck.
"I, uh," Daniel said. "I use it...so that I don't forget something if I want to review it later. Then again," he joked, "from what I've heard about your people, maybe you just don't ever forget things, huh?"
"That is correct," Zaren said, nodding.
"Oh," Daniel said.
"But you may use this memory aid if you wish," she said, poking at the front until it closed.
Daniel cleared his throat. "Right. Thanks." He pushed the 'REC' button and set it aside. "Could you teach me your language?"
"Why?" Zaren asked. "I speak yours. The passage of knowledge is more efficient in this way."
"W...yes, well, maybe that's true," Daniel conceded. "But afterward, maybe you could let me record some of your language so I can try to learn about it on my own time?"
She looked at him dubiously. "But you will have no need of it if we have already given our knowledge to each other."
"Actually, I think language is important as more than just a means of communication," he sighed, "but a lot of my, uh, my people would probably agree with you."
"I can speak into your artificial memory device later," she offered.
Daniel allowed a small smile. "Thank you. Actually, speaking of records, I would call this mural here is a kind of record." There were designs and symbols covering almost all of the walls, interspersed with occasional painted figures. "That's what we call this type of art, by the way--a mural."
"It is without purpose," Zaren said. Before he could protest, she said, "What is 'art?'"
"What is...?" How did one define that properly? "The word 'art' can cover a wide range of meanings. It comes from Latin, too, 'ars, artis,' which refers to technical skill. It still has that meaning today in English, but its primary meaning is for something that's created in...um, in a creative way." He could tell how helpful that wasn't. "Um...something you make up that appeals to the senses or the emotions."
"What purpose does it serve?"
"Well...it serves...it's...appealing. Creativity can be an end in and of itself, and it can also be used to give other people enjoyment." Zaren frowned at him. "It's fun and enjoyable," Daniel tried. "Subjectively, of course, but that's part of the fun, too."
"Fun?" she repeated.
Daniel bit his lip. "You didn't learn that word from SG-1? No? Well...'fun' is something you enjoy doing." She still looked confused, so he said, "Something that gives you pleasure."
"Gaining knowledge to help my people gives me great pleasure," Zaren said.
"Me, too," he said, a grin taking him by surprise. "Well, art can also be fun."
"But it does not further one's knowledge."
"But it does. Here, step back," he said. He searched the mural for a figure he recognized and pointed up. "There. What does that look like?"
Zaren looked up at his face, then at his finger, and stepped closer so she could follow the line of his arm. "It is a woman, depicted with poor accuracy. A branch protrudes strangely from her hand, and fluids leak from beneath her robe in an unrealistic manner."
Daniel blinked and looked down at her earnest expression. "O--okay. I guess that's...a valid way of looking at it. Or you could see a representation of Chalchiuitlicue, a goddess of water. The, uh...fluid is a river that flows from her skirt, see? The shape of that branch is what we call a cross in our language, and it represents the four winds that bring rain."
"There are not four winds," Zaren informed him.
"Well, maybe not literally," he admitted. "That just helps to map out our geography--one for each of four directions, see?"
"Linear directions are an inaccurate depiction of a spheroid planet."
With a sigh, Daniel said, "It's an approximation. My point is... What I was saying is that this can tell you about your past. And understanding where you come from helps you learn about...about yourself in the present, and about what makes you who you are."
Zaren pondered this. "Then the purpose of art truly is to further knowledge."
"That's not...well, yes, it can be," he said, not completely satisfied with that definition but unsure how to explain it better.
"What is that?" she asked, pointing into another corner with one hand and tugging his arm along with the other.
He scooped up his tape recorder and followed her. "I'm not totally sure. What do you think?"
Zaren tilted her head and thought for a moment as they stopped in front of an admittedly abstract figure. "It is a man," she said. "His face is oddly proportioned, but given that he holds a representation of electricity and water in his hands, perhaps he is a deity as well."
"Yeah, I think you're right," Daniel agreed. "That could well be Tlaloc, the lord of water."
She touched part of the painting with the other. "What is the word for this color?"
"Red. Or maybe orange."
"I like this one better," she said, moving her finger.
"Blue," Daniel filled in. "Why?"
"I do not know. It is illogical. The difference between the light from either one of them that reaches our eyes is a quantitative distinction--"
"I like blue," he told her. "It doesn't have to be logical. That's why my culture enjoys art--you can like it or not, and someone else can disagree, and you can both be right."
Zaren considered. "Then I like blue because it is appealing to me."
"All right," he said, unaccountably warmed as he gestured her onward.
...x...
Daniel waved good-bye to Zaren for the night as Teal'c reported to base through the MALP.
"They're still working on the reactor," Jack's voice was telling Teal'c. "How's...how are you guys doing over there?"
"We are making rapid progress, O'Neill," Teal'c said. "Daniel Jackson believes that further study on Orban by an archaeological team may reveal much. The Urrone learn quickly."
"Yeah, apparently. You sure there aren't child labor laws or something? Because I think Merrin's been up for about twenty-four hours straight, and she's still going."
"That's just how their society works, Jack," Daniel said, walking toward Teal'c to join in. "But being Urrone is a great honor to them. They're very eager to contribute their skills."
"Well, of course you'd say that, Daniel," Jack muttered, sounding suddenly irritated, and then, "Check in tomorrow, kids. Have a good night. SGC out."
Daniel stared at the wormhole, frowning, as it shimmered out of existence.
"O'Neill is not angry," Teal'c told him, shutting off the MALP and straightening. "No doubt he grows restless watching the child work."
"I don't care," Daniel sighed. "I'm tired of trying to guess what people mean all the time these days." Teal'c looked at him. "What?"
"You have said in the past that communication relies on more than the words that are spoken."
"Well, sometimes it would help if people would just let the words get spoken."
"Then I will speak my mind," Teal'c said.
"Oops," Daniel muttered, sitting down on the steps to the Stargate and bracing himself.
"I am not convinced that you are well, Daniel Jackson."
Daniel took a deep breath and blew it out. "No long-term effects from Machello's device or the Tau'ri medicines so far. The doctors can't find anything wrong with me." Not that Janet had found anything wrong before when he was going mad. Not that he was really worried about that, most of the time.
"That is good," Teal'c said. Daniel couldn't tell whether he was convinced yet.
"Jaffa never have to worry about the mind becoming sick, do they?"
"They do not," Teal'c said, which was, somehow, rather disheartening. Then he clarified, "It is seen as a weakness in the armies of the Goa'uld. Those Jaffa do not live long enough to worry."
Daniel shivered. "That...that's nice."
"It is not," Teal'c said seriously. "Jaffa warriors spend their lives fighting. I have seen my strongest brothers trapped in their own minds after battle. I have abandoned others because it was not permitted to help them."
"Jaffa survival of the fittest?"
"Jaffa ignorance of this matter, enforced by Goa'uld oppression," Teal'c corrected. "Do the people of Abydos believe the same?"
He leaned his elbows onto his knees. "On Abydos, when people's minds become weak and are taken by disease, a physician can read their dreams. There are medicines to direct them toward healing." He shrugged. "Well, I don't know if it works. They're never the same, after."
Teal'c stared at him for a long time. "Your mind was not weak, Daniel Jackson."
Daniel rolled his eyes. "Well, I know that. It was Machello's bugs, so it only seemed like my mind was--"
"I requested information about schizophrenia from Dr. Fraiser," Teal'c interrupted, frowning deeply. "She spoke with me on that subject at great length. It is an illness like any other and is not caused by a weakness of the mind."
"Oh." He squinted down at his boots, not sure if he believed that, because if his mind really had been as strong as he had always thought, he wouldn't have thought dead Goa'uld might try to take him as a host. The one thing he had always been proud of was his brain, and everything about the last few weeks felt so stupid now. "Well, I didn't know that," he said.
Not that he was thinking about that, anyway; it hadn't been real schizophrenia or anything.
"Perhaps you should ask Dr. Fraiser if you wish to know more," Teal'c said.
Daniel wasn't sure how much he did want to know at the moment about how and why the mind fell apart under any circumstance, and even if he'd been curious, there were levels to Janet's involvement in all of this that he wasn't willing to explore just yet. "Maybe. Later," he said, then stood and made his way toward the mosaic on the floor to examine it again. "I wonder why Zaren and Tomin decided to take a break now. From what Zaren told me, Urrone need even less sleep than you."
"They have been working continuously for the last two days," Teal'c pointed out. "However, you are not Urrone. We should rest until they return."
"It's not that late," Daniel said, returning to his pack to pull out a brush. "They said they'd be back in the morning, so we have time. Hey, what are you--!" The brush was lifted from his hand.
"You are here," Teal'c said, carefully laying the brush back down in the pack, "despite the fact that you have not been declared ready for fieldwork. You will obey my word, or you will return to base."
Daniel scowled at the floor, wondering if he could reach his pack and pull out paper to sketch the mosaic before Teal'c stole that, too. It was a stupid thought, of course. He'd thought a lot of stupid thoughts lately. Who said his mind wasn't weak? "You told the general you should have tried sooner to make Machello's device transfer from me into you," Daniel said.
"It would have spared you much suffering," Teal'c said, which meant yes.
Daniel turned his scowl onto his friend. "How can you say that?" he spat. "You think that would have spared me anything? What would I do if you died, too?"
Teal'c didn't look away, but his eyes flickered downward for a brief moment. "You are tired."
"It's not that late," Daniel said, brushing some loose dirt from the mosaic with his fingers.
"That was not my meaning."
He pulled his hand inside the sleeve of his jacket and used the cloth to sweep clean a corner of the mosaic that had been hidden under the dirt before. "I've read about artwork like this, but I've never actually seen it before, not so well preserved," he said, hoping the subject would be dropped. "I wonder if this is Quetzalcoatl, or the feathered serpent under another name?"
Teal'c hovered nearby but was slow in answering. When he finally did, he said, "Who was Quetzalcoatl, Daniel Jackson?"
"A creator deity. He... Let me think... I think he brought craft and farming to the people, something like that. Sometimes, he's also associated with sacrifice and resurr..." He stopped.
"Resurrection," Teal'c filled in.
They saw that attribute a lot, too. It wasn't as if the Goa'uld didn't have access to devices capable of bringing people and themselves back to life. It was always a Goa'uld.
Daniel touched the concrete slab that covered the mosaic, then drew away, suddenly uninterested in seeing what might be hiding under it. "I'm going to sleep, okay?" Teal'c's eyes remained on him as he lay his bedroll against the platform leading to the Stargate. "I'm tired," he said, and Teal'c let it be.
...x...
15 October 1999; Stargate Room, Orban; 0700 hrs
He'd been right to wonder about the two Urrone's sudden disappearance the night before.
"It is impossible for Tomin and Zaren to be here," Kalan said, bringing an unfamiliar boy named Solen to Teal'c for tutelage. "They have gone through Averium."
A thrill of fear slithered through Daniel's bones. What passage of knowledge took a ceremony that left the student unavailable afterward? "Exactly what is Averium?" he asked cautiously.
"Solen can explain," Kalan offered, gesturing toward the Urrone.
"I would like to see Tomin immediately," Teal'c countered.
Kalan looked bewildered but agreed to lead Teal'c to his son Tomin while Solen prepared to explain to Daniel.
"I require another word to explain," Solen said as Teal'c left the 'gate room with Kalan. "What is your word for the very small processors that can be inserted into a human?"
That sounded like something Sam would know, but Daniel tried, "Processor, like...a device to--"
"To store and process information," Solen said.
"A computer?"
"They can be used to compute," Solen agreed. "They are too small for the eye to see without aid and can be inserted through a needle into the blood or the brain."
Injectable computers....Oh. Oh no. "Nanites," Daniel realized. "You mean...small machines that can be programmed--set to do different tasks?"
Solen nodded. "That is correct. I will use the word 'nanite' in the future."
"They were infected with nanites?" he said, his mind zipping through emergency protocols. They had to warn the SGC immediately and recommend a lockdown until they could verify that anyone who had stepped foot on Orban--and anyone they had been in contact with--was clean.
But...
"These nanites are the way we acquire knowledge," Solen said. "Every Orbanian receives one nanite each Averium. Urrone children are given many more nanites at birth, because we are required to learn vast amounts of information very quickly. If this is done at infancy, the nanites can serve as additional connections in the brain before the usual connections are established."
"So they help you learn," Daniel said, "but what happens at Averium?"
"The nanites are removed from the Urrone's brain," Solen said. "Each adult and non-Urrone child receives an injection containing one nanite, which becomes part of his or her brain, adding to those nanites received from previous ceremonies. It is the most efficient way of passing knowledge from Urrone to others."
"And the Urrone? What happens to you, after your Averium?"
"We remain together with other past Urrone," Solen told him. "We are not damaged."
This couldn't be fight. Surely he was misunderstanding? "But all the knowledge you've spent your entire life learning--you lose all of that?" Daniel asked.
"After Averium, a Urrone's brain rejects new nanites, so no further learning can take place. The knowledge will no longer be in me, but it can make a great contribution to Orbanian society."
Daniel stared at him, feeling sick. "You said your nanites were implanted before your brain's normal connections formed. So when they're removed...does that mean...?"
"That is correct. My knowledge will reside in the other Orbanians instead. The procedure will not damage me, and I will be well cared for in exchange for the knowledge I provide them."
"But--"
"I do not understand your concern," Solen said.
Footsteps announced Teal'c's arrival. Daniel tore his eyes away from Solen. "Teal'c, did you...?"
"Indeed," Teal'c growled, his expression thunderous. "All of Tomin's knowledge has been removed. There is nothing left of the boy I knew."
Daniel swallowed. "It's nanites," he said in a low voice. Teal'c raised an eyebrow. "They give nanites to Urrone at birth. We taught only the Urrone because that's the only way they gain knowledge--the knowledge is stored in the nanites and physically passed to other Orbanians."
Teal'c looked between him and Solen, who seemed curious but uncomprehending of their concern. "Kalan says that the Urrone are well cared for after Averium."
"So are beasts of burden on Abydos!" Daniel hissed.
"Merrin," Teal'c said suddenly, looking toward the Stargate. "She appeared to be approximately the same age as Tomin and Zaren. The SGC must have discovered her nanites already--I must warn them of this Averium."
"Why are you displeased?" Kalan said, hurrying in. "I assure you, Tomin will not be mistreated."
Daniel turned to Kalan, somehow even more horrified than before. "He's your son!"
The man's confusion was turning into annoyance now as he said, "And I was never more proud than I was the day I learned that my son would be Urrone."
Daniel exchanged a glance with Teal'c. "I'll wait here and try to...learn something," he offered. "Anything."
Teal'c nodded. "I will return soon."
Once Teal'c had disappeared through the wormhole, Daniel picked up his pack, met Kalan's frown, and said, "May I see Zaren?"
XXXXX
15 October 1999; Children's Home, Orban; 0800 hrs
Daniel knelt in front of the bed. "Zaren? Do you remember me? It's Daniel."
Zaren frowned at him and bounced once on her bed.
"Knowledge of you and of your language was in her nanites," Kalan said from behind him.
"And you took that from her," Daniel said. They'd taken her mind away, and what was left?
"Yes. She gave it to the other Orbanians."
Ignoring Kalan, Daniel turned on his camera and flipped it around so she could see the display. "Remember this?" he asked. Zaren leaned closer, raising a finger to touch the screen where it showed blue tile of the mosaic. "You do?" he said, but she only grinned happily and dragged the finger down the screen, giggling and pulling her hand back when it swung shut.
Daniel clenched his teeth but forced himself to smile at Zaren when her laughs died down, then pushed the camera back into his pack. He carefully kept his face clear until they were out of the building, out of sight of Zaren and the other children. "Everything that is done to these children--it is acceptable to you?" he asked stiffly.
"They have a duty of their people," Kalan said impatiently.
"Is that what you tell them? That it's their duty to be sacrificed for Orbanian progress?"
"It is their honor, and ours, for them to contribute to our society!" Kalan snapped, starting back toward the Stargate. "They are happy, and you saw for yourself that Zaren is well now. You dishonor them by dismissing their part in what Orban has achieved."
"I'm not dismissing it," Daniel argued, trotting to catch up. "But--"
Kalan stopped and turned to him. "You are proud of who you are?"
Surprised, Daniel said, "What?"
"I govern in Orban--I have pride in my place. You study and gain knowledge for Earth--are there not things you give up for that end, and are you not proud of what you do nonetheless?"
"But I had a choice," Daniel said. "Well...not at first. But...Kalan, I can hardly compare anything I have given up to what you ask of your Urrone."
"It is their choice and their honor," Kalan said. "See what we have accomplished--if you could help to bring your world to progress as fast as we have, would you not do everything in your power? I do not force Urrone to do anything they do not wish for themselves, and they will be honored as...'heroes,' as you would say, for all time."
Perhaps it was good that Teal'c had returned by then and was waiting by the Stargate, because Daniel didn't know how to answer that.
"Kalan," Teal'c said, "we do not believe the Averium would be in Merrin's best interest."
Kalan's eyes widened in surprise, then darkened. "It is most certainly in her best interest, for her and her people!"
"You don't force them to undergo Averium, you said," Daniel said. "What if she chooses otherwise? Surely we could discuss other solutions?"
"There are no other solutions," Kalan said, angry, spinning on his heel to leave after giving Daniel a final glare, as if realizing he had mostly been stalling to give time for Teal'c speak to the SGC and report. "You will return Merrin to us immediately for the Averium!"
Teal'c met Daniel's gaze once they were alone in the room. "O'Neill and Major Carter are attempting to convince Merrin to choose not to return to Orban."
"Will she?" Daniel asked. "Refuse Averium, I mean."
"I do not believe she will," Teal'c said. "I must inform the SGC of Kalan's response."
"I'll stay," Daniel offered. "I'll keep trying to convince them there's another way. They might be unhappy with us, but they won't hurt me. It's not their way."
Teal'c paused in dialing the DHD. "They cannot reach Earth without a remote code."
"Then I can hold Kalan here," Daniel said. "It'll at least give you more time to talk to Merrin."
XXXXX
15 October 1999; Stargate Room, Orban; 1100 hrs
It was hours before Kalan returned to the 'gate room. Daniel stood when Kalan stormed back in. "I gave you time to let your people see reason," the Orbanian leader said, "but I see they still refuse to let Merrin return."
Daniel took a deep breath. "We only want the best for her. Kalan, the Orbanians are an incredibly advanced people. Won't you even consider the idea of better ways of learning?"
Kalan huffed. "There is no better way. You are taking away Merrin's chance at Averium."
"There are ways of learning without using and discarding children!"
Furious, Kalan said, "You told Zaren that you loved knowledge of different peoples, and yet you demand that we change when you dislike our ways!" He moved toward the DHD, reaching as if to dial.
Daniel rushed to stand in front of it as a physical barrier. "You can't do that. There's a shield in front our Stargate, and you'll be killed if you go through without me."
"If your people do not allow Merrin to return to us, the knowledge she has spent years learning will be lost," Kalan said, scowling. "She is the only Urrone who has studied naquadah technology her whole life. We must be prepared for an attack if the Goa'uld come here."
"There's no reason to think that'll happen," Daniel said. "We don't know if the Goa'uld will--"
"From what I have learned of the Goa'uld from my son, I know technology will increase their interest here," Kalan said. "If you claim otherwise, you are trying to deceive either us or yourself."
Daniel gripped the DHD behind him. "I'm not... Okay. Maybe you're right. But Merrin--you'll take away everything that makes her who she is. She'll be dead in all the ways that matter."
Kalan looked surprised again and tapped his temple. "She will be here. She will be with all the Orbanians. But if you hold Merrin against her will, her work will be lost, and we will have to wait twelve years for another Urrone to learn in order for naquadah research to continue."
It would just be repeated, then. Holding Merrin would only keep her from what she saw as her duty; as shocking as the Averium process was to Daniel, he had no doubt that she would be unhappy if she were denied what she saw as her place. Progress would be hindered and society disrupted while the Goa'uld might come any time, and the cycle would just be repeated with another. Unless they were willing to declare war on this world to force their own views...but that would make them no better than the Goa'uld, and, quite honestly, Orban could probably win.
"If you were in Merrin's place..." Daniel said, trying one last time.
"I would be appalled to be refused a chance to undergo Averium," Kalan said sincerely. "But I was not chosen to be Urrone. I would have been honored." When Daniel still hesitated, he said, "Do not fear for her. She will not suffer, as you have seen of the other past Urrone."
What was more important than the freedom to choose one's own path?
Sam would understand, maybe, if not agree. Teal'c knew it was the only way. Jack would never forgive him.
Daniel swallowed, then turned around to dial Earth himself. He waited for the wormhole to be established and sent his IDC.
XXXXX
15 October 1999; SGC, Earth; 1130 hrs
"Mr. Jackson," General Hammond said when he stepped out. "You know the rules about bringing anyone into this facility."
"Yes, sir," Daniel said, not quite meeting his eyes. "But the Orbanians have requested that Merrin return to her home. We can't continue to refuse. Sir."
He could feel the general's eyes on him despite his averted gaze. "Merrin is still in Major Carter's lab, finishing work on the naquadah reactor."
Kalan stepped forward. "You will not allow her to return as she would wish, but you are willing to hold her prisoner here and use her knowledge to further your own technology?"
The general looked surprised--clearly, he hadn't thought of it that way--but sighed. "I understand. I've been expecting this. Let's wait in my office. I'll have someone call Colonel O'Neill to meet us there. Merrin will return with you, Kalan."
...x...
Daniel couldn't help looking up when the door swung open, and he could tell by the expression that Jack knew, and that there was no placating him this time. "Jack," he started.
"No," Jack said flatly.
"Merrin will return to Orban with Kalan," the general said. "I've already granted the request."
"Your Daniel Jackson has come to realize Merrin's importance to her people," Kalan said.
"Her importance as a vegetable?" Jack said.
Daniel flinched as the general snapped, "Colonel!"
Kalan stood to face Jack. "If you would try to understand--"
Jack ignored the general and retorted, "No, I won't! The way you treat your children is absurd! You don't deserve them."
"Colonel O'Neill!" the general barked, leaping to his feet.
"Jack," Daniel started again.
Jack's eyes said traitor, and Daniel stopped and looked away. "Request permission to be excused, sir," Jack growled. He turned and walked away without waiting for an answer.
Daniel sank lower into his chair as the other two men remained standing, Kalan staring after Jack in astonishment while General Hammond massaged his temple. "I apologize," the general told Kalan. "I'll have Merrin sent down now."
An alarm blared. Kalan jumped. The general reached for his phone. Daniel sighed and watched the light flash red.
The alarms stopped. "In the future, Major," the general was saying, "before you activate any device that includes the word 'reactor,' I would appreciate it if you would notify me."
Ah. The naquadah reactor had worked. So they'd harvested all they could of Merrin, too, before sending her back to have the rest of her brain harvested. Daniel thought he said, "Excuse me, sir," but he might have simply walked out the door. Either way, no one stopped him.
...x...
Some time later, the general found him in the library and said that Colonel O'Neill had taken Merrin and gone AWOL, and did Daniel have any idea where he might have taken her?
"I don't know," Daniel said, though, in truth, he wasn't surprised.
A sigh. "Would it do any good to look for him at his house?" the general said.
Jack was smarter than that. "No, sir. But if she wants to go home, he'll bring her back eventually, I'm sure of it."
"I'm not sure Kalan will be comforted by that."
Daniel nodded at his hands. "Do you, um. Do you need me for anything?" he asked.
"No; we just need Colonel O'Neill here." The general shook his head. "You did the right thing, son, with Kalan."
"How can that possibly be the right--" Daniel stopped. The general had an angry Orbanian to deal with now, and a missing colonel and Urrone. The last thing he needed was to give more platitudes. "Yes, sir," he said. He pushed away from the table and fled to his room.
XXXXX
16 October 1999; Daniel Jackson's Quarters, SGC; 1700 hrs
Jack stepped into his room the next day without knocking. "We're back."
Daniel didn't look up. "From where?"
Jack pushed the door quietly shut behind him. "Orban. You didn't hear us leave?" Daniel shook his head. "We went to visit the kids." Jack sat stiffly on his bed and twisted to look down at him on the floor. "They're playing. Drawing pictures, having fun."
"No, they're not. I visited Zaren, and she was just...sitting there."
Jack shifted. "Well, not anymore. Merrin got an eyeful of playground equipment and whatnot, and they're teaching all the kids to play catch and...hopscotch and things like that now. We gave them more crayons and stuff."
Daniel almost asked what equipment was on a playground, or what hopscotch was, but he found he didn't really care. "Oh," he said bitterly. "It's all okay, then."
"I know it's not, goddammit!" He glanced up to see Jack visibly restraining himself from snapping something more, and he remembered which one of them had been so furious at the idea of Averium that he'd risked court-martial to show her another life for a few hours--which of them had tried to give another choice.
"Are you in trouble?" Daniel asked.
"Ask if I care."
Daniel fixed his gaze on the floor again and couldn't muster the effort.
"This Zaren you mentioned," Jack said eventually. He held out a sheet of paper with something scribbled over the surface. "She drew this. Kalan thought you should have it--"
Daniel ripped the paper violently away, crumpled it into a ball, and whipped it across the room.
"Okay," Jack said shortly, standing up.
"They killed her," he said, pulling his knees toward his chest. "And I helped them kill Merrin."
"She's not dead."
Daniel laughed humorlessly with his face buried in his knees. "Do you know what it's like to lose your mind? Does it even matter now?" Was he even making sense? Maybe he was losing his mind again, too. He'd been half-expecting it, anyway.
"It's not the same thing, Daniel," Jack said tightly.
Maybe it wasn't the same, but he'd spent two weeks feeling like everything that made him who he was had been taken away, and he hadn't even lost anything, not really; it would be over if he could just stop thinking about it. It wasn't the same at all--wasn't it even worse for the Urrone, who really had lost everything they'd packed into their minds? Except that they'd had a choice, and whether or not he approved, how could he claim to be able to decide for them?
"I had to bring Kalan to the SGC," he said, looking up. Jack was at the door, a hand on the doorknob and his eyes fixed on the frame, so he said quickly, "I had to, Jack. It was her choice, and we didn't have the right to--"
"I thought you'd get it--we let you down before we ever got to Merrin," Jack said. Daniel shook his head, but Jack wasn't looking, so Daniel couldn't tell if he'd seen. His voice was controlled, the way it was when he wanted to yell and was trying hard not to. "How long have you been sitting there? You're still in gear from yesterday."
Daniel didn't know, so he didn't answer. A muscle twitched in Jack's jaw, and then he left.
...x...
Daniel started when a knock came on his door. A few moments later, Teal'c's voice said from outside, "Daniel Jackson?"
Two knocks later, Teal'c entered and shut the door behind himself. He studied Daniel silently for a moment, and his eyes found the crumpled ball of paper on the floor. He bent to pick it up, then carefully opened and smoothed it before holding it out.
"I don't want it," Daniel said.
"Perhaps," Teal'c said, but he didn't move, and Daniel finally took the sheet and looked at it.
It was a stick figure, like the ones Sam always made when she tried to draw humans. Sam must have taught Merrin at some point, and Merrin had given that to Kalan, and Kalan had taught Zaren, and now the stick figure had mud-colored hair and wore a lopsided, blue dress. He guessed it was supposed to be meaningful, but he hadn't known the person who had drawn that picture. The person he'd thought was Zaren--and Tomin and Merrin--had been the compiled contents of nanites, and once the nanites were gone, what was left?
He didn't realize he was wound so tight until Teal'c settled next to him and he jumped again. Teal'c paused, then gently put the drawing aside.
"I thought this time was different, Teal'c," Daniel said. "It was supposed to be a research trip. I kept thinking that Zaren and Tomin were so smart, and loved learning things, and then it was...gone. And Merrin, too. She was just a child."
"That is a grief we understand well," Teal'c said quietly.
Daniel slid his hands inside his sleeves, only then noticing they were still dusty with Orbanian dirt. "I don't know what to do," he admitted. "I've never been so..."
Teal'c didn't answer for a long time. Finally, he said again, "You are tired." He reached around Daniel and tugged on his sleeve until his arm slid out of the jacket. Daniel sat and let him do the same to the other arm, then watched him hang the jacket neatly on the back of a chair. "We forget that you have lived only a fraction of our lives. Every battle is longer to you."
Sure that there was a lesson there, Daniel tried to unravel it, but he really was tired, so he gave up. "Is Sam still in her lab? With the reactor?"
"Major Carter went home immediately upon our return from Orban."
So she didn't want to look at it, either, their reward for Merrin's brain. "Jack?"
"General Hammond is displeased with his actions," Teal'c answered, though both of them knew that was an enormous understatement.
"He's angry. He doesn't even want to look at me, Teal'c," Daniel mumbled.
"O'Neill requires time to grieve without adding to your troubles," Teal'c said after a moment. "He would not have asked me to come here if he did not also worry for you. But--"
"But he wants to yell at me at the same time," Daniel guessed unhappily.
"I believe O'Neill is uncertain of how he should behave toward you at the moment."
"Yeah." Everyone kept saying he was between child and adult, or that he was both, but to Jack, he could be one or the other but not both at the same time. It was part of what made working with him so easy at times and utterly impossible at others. Daniel started to get up, then froze, staring at his wrist. "Teal'c...where--" Frantically, he checked his other wrist, then rose to search the bare top of the nightstand. "Skaara's...his band, the one he gave me. Gods, they took it, didn't they?"
"I found it when we retrieved your belongings from Mental Health," Teal'c said quietly.
He was ashamed at the strength of the relief that nearly knocked him over, and he carefully sat back down on the bed. "It's just...a string of leather. I didn't even notice it was gone. It doesn't mean...I just never take it off."
"Perhaps," Teal'c said again. "Come with me."
"Teal'c--"
"Do not fight me. Stand up." Daniel shut up and stood. Teal'c steered him out of his room.
Once they reached Teal'c's quarters, Teal'c returned to him the ro'ri leather cord Skaara had given him years ago, untied now and fraying at one end but still whole. "And...and yours?" Daniel asked, not meeting Teal'c's eyes. "Did you find the other one, too?"
"Indeed." Teal'c handed the other strip to him as well but didn't let go. "Are you ready?" Daniel started to nod, but Teal'c said, "Stop. We will trust your word, but you will not lie to me, chal'ti, or to yourself. Are you prepared to join us and fight again?"
Daniel looked away and shook his head. "I don't know. Maybe not."
Teal'c knotted one band, and then the other, around his wrist. "Good. When you say you are ready, we will believe you, but not until then."
"I'm tired of people being hurt," Daniel said. "Sometimes, it's like there's nothing else."
"There is much more than that. You have forgotten, but you will remember again," Teal'c said. "There is no shame in rest. You help no one if you lose yourself first."
XXXXX
18 October 1999; Archaeology Office, SGC; 0900 hrs
"So, you know that symposium in Chicago?" Robert said.
Daniel hovered at the door to their office. "When is it?"
"This weekend."
"Oh. I forgot about it."
"Yeah," Robert said. "Are you still coming?"
Daniel sat down slowly at his desk, comforted by the solidity of the desk before him and the chair behind but not particularly interested, for once, in what was on the desk. "Why wouldn't I go?"
"W--well, I mean, no reason. Just. Are you?" Robert fidgeted with his pen, looking uncomfortable. "It's up to you, obviously. You want to?"
...x...
18 October 1999; General Hammond's Office, SGC; 1000 hrs
"General," Daniel said when he was gestured inside the office.
"What can I do for you?" General Hammond said.
"You said I could have time off," Daniel said. "There's an Egyptology conference, and I know Robert and I would both be gone at the same time, but--"
"It's fine," the general said. "Dr. Rothman told me already. And I do want you to take time off, not just a weekend--take the rest of this week. And really, this time."
"I think I'd like to take a few days, as well, sir," he said, the admission leaving him simultaneously uncomfortable and relieved.
General Hammond sighed. "Are you all right, son?" Daniel nodded, because there wasn't really another answer he could give to the general. "I...will admit that your situation is not what we're used to dealing with if you need help. Is there anything I can do?"
"I don't--I just need some time to think, that's all," he promised. "Permission to speak--?"
"Of course."
"Don't court-martial Jack," he said.
"Daniel..." the general said.
"He was trying to do the right thing. And maybe it was the right thing. And he told me... I think maybe you were right, I'm a liability to their team and their...their judgment. And I wasn't acting the way a member of SG-1 should have when Kalan was here, and I was even denying the--I didn't want to acknowledge the ramifications of what we were seeing there and--it doesn't matter. The point is, my judgment was wrong--"
"Yes, it was," the general said. Daniel stopped and found himself looking at his feet. "Since I was the one who authorized you to go, thinking it would be safe, I won't pretend I wasn't at fault, too, but Mr. Jackson, you understand now how important it is to recognize your limits. It's not something to be embarrassed about; it's being responsible."
"Yes, sir," Daniel told the floor.
"In the end, you did the right thing with the Orbanians," the general said. "This time, Colonel O'Neill made the wrong call. It's that simple. We both know Jack--he might have done the same no matter what your involvement was."
"But I make it worse."
"Colonel O'Neill disobeyed direct orders, kidnapped a little girl, and could have sparked an interplanetary disaster with a highly advanced planet. He is responsible for his actions. I need him to act as a leader of the team that represents Earth, not as a worried...parent. To anyone. There is no room for that kind of misjudgment."
"Sir--"
"He won't be brought up on charges," the general said, "but I have responsibilities, too. This was a major misstep, and his record will reflect that. That's the best I can do."
"Yes, sir," Daniel said. "And something else: I think we should send someone back to Orban to learn more."
General Hammond gave him a long look. Daniel felt his fingers started to fidget with the seam of his jacket, so he folded his hands under his arms instead. "Maybe the Urrone have a choice to go through Averium," the general said, "but since they had no say in becoming Urrone, I'm not sure they do have a real choice. Colonel O'Neill thinks they're all brainwashed, in a way, and I can't say I disagree--"
"I think so, too," Daniel started, "them and the adults and everyone else, and in fact--"
"I'm not going to interfere with their way of life, Mr. Jackson. That doesn't mean I condone it. I cannot support relations with a people that treats its citizens in that way."
"Yes, sir," Daniel agreed, "I know, but please, hear me out. The Orbanians started using nanites less than fifty years ago, and I could be completely wrong, but...well, Zaren said they don't keep records because they don't need it, with the nanites. Now, I don't know what happened fifty years ago, if there was a Goa'uld or...an accident or anything, but something happened to erase their old way of life so completely that they don't remember any other choice, and they don't even have records to remind them."
"I understand that's changed since we went there."
"But not enough. Someone could go and teach the Urrone to...to teach, and eventually, it'll show them another option. And we could restore relations with them and gain their help in developing technology, and we'd be influencing a change in them without forcing it."
General Hammond looked thoughtful. "Not SG-1, I think..."
"No, sir, that would be...bad, probably. But there are other teams."
"I'll consider it. It's a good point, Mr. Jackson."
Daniel swallowed. "And about SG-1...nothing will happen to the team?"
"Before you're cleared for full duty, you mean?" the general said. Daniel flushed little in embarrassment, but the general seemed to understand. "SG-1 will act as a three-man team, as before, unless they need someone to assist them. But I need them to find a fourth member--if only because they'd be safer with another person to help--and I can't hold that open forever."
"No, sir. I know you can't wait for me to..." To what? Pull himself together? Stop acting crazy?
General Hammond sighed again. "Others who have assisted them in the past tell me they're difficult to work with."
Daniel nodded, gratified to be included in that confidence. "I've heard some people say the same, but that's just because their...methods and interaction with each other are unconventional, but they're also important to the way the team operates." He worked well with them because he understood that and respected it, as they understood that his own unusual methods could be a contribution and not an obstacle.
"The four of you are...the most eclectic and most unpredictable team I've ever considered putting together," the general said, rubbing his forehead. "That's paid off in the past--like what you just recommended about Orban might pay off again--but I can't afford that all the time. And I don't know if it would be best for each of you, either. I need to think about this."
"I understand, sir."
The general shook his head. "I can't hold the position indefinitely--and I do want you to take as much time as you need to be ready--but SG-1 will still want to know where you are, part of their team or not. Tell them before you leave for the conference. For now, you'll just report to Dr. Rothman, like before. We'll sort out everything else when you get back."
XXXXX
18 October 1999; Colonel O'Neill's Office, SGC; 1200 hrs
"Jack?" Daniel said tentatively at the door to the office.
A rubber ball bounced off a wall. "We're going off-world again tomorrow morning," Jack said.
"I know," Daniel answered, with an odd mixture of panic and dejection. "I'm leaving, too." Jack caught the ball, stopped, and looked at him. He looked away. "Not until Friday. It's the conference, with Robert. I wanted to...I don't know. You're--you're leaving tomorrow?"
Jack set the ball down on his desk. "Yeah."
Daniel took a breath. "Where? Is it..."
"Just a regular exploration. No more dangerous than usual," Jack said.
Considering the last few missions they'd had, that wasn't really comforting, but Daniel nodded mutely anyway.
He wasn't sure what his face looked like, but Jack sighed and raked a hand through his hair. "Daniel. You'll be okay?"
Daniel nodded. "I need to get my head together," he said, repeating Jack's own words. "It's not a big deal. Only a few days, and I'll be with Robert. Be careful, okay?"
"'Course. I'll call you as soon as we get back from our mission. That phone I gave you, keep it on, all right? It'll be fine."
"Yeah?" Daniel said.
Teal'c would have said something like 'I cannot say for certain,' but Jack said, "Yeah, promise." Daniel thought maybe he needed both answers, which made no sense at all, so he nodded uncertainly and left.
From the next chapter ("Perspectives"):
"Just don't get lost," Robert advised, keeping a close eye on his position.
"Right," Daniel said, looking like that was the last thing he wanted to do. "No. Sure."
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Oh my... Well, there's Deadman Switch. :)
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You had Zaren's 'Urrone-voice' absolutely perfect with her clinical description of the stylized ['inaccurate' :-)] representation of the Goddess. :-) She was studying it so intently and noticing details of all sorts, but just didn't get it. WOnderful!
So here's hoping your upcoming "interlude" includes/makes reference to the impression that Daniel and Robert's former associates leave on each other. Somehow I can't see Daniel successfully staying on the periphery at a conference on Egyptology. ;-)
As always, a great job!
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Cheers!
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Thanks!